7 Things I Did To Stop Wasting My Evenings After Work (Or School)

The people who “don’t have time” and the people who “always find time” have the same amount of time.

That was one of my most viral Substack posts that seemed to have resonated with a lot of people. One of the main reason is because of this idea that while your day job may pay your bills, your 5-9 determines who you become. Those few hours after work are where books get written, life-changing content gets uploaded, businesses get built, bodies get healthier, relationships deepen and ultimately lives begin to change.

But for most people, that is not the case. Those hours disappear into distraction before we even realise it. The harsh reality is this: most people spend their energy trying to maintain their current life rather than work towards their ideal future.They deep down want something, but their daily routine is misaligned with their goals.

I want to ask you a few questions before we move forward. Where do you want to be in one year? And does your current lifestyle back it? It’s as simple as that. The bigger the gap between those two, the less likely you are to accomplish it.

You’re not naturally lazy, but you might be stuck in decision fatigue, cognitive overload, and a nervous system that is over stimulated. I know we all have that genuine feeling of wanting to change, but somehow keep falling into the same patterns every night.

How many times have you told yourself that after work (or school) you’re finally going to exercise, work on a passion project, cook a healthy meal, read a book, or try a new hobby? You keep telling yourself that tomorrow you’ll do what you said, but tomorrow never arrives.

99% of people approach their 5-9 wrong. They rely on motivation instead of systems. Research shows that the quality of our decisions tend to decline throughout the day as mental energy gets depleted. I spoke about this in my previous video. Most “systems” around us are designed to make passive behaviour incredibly easy. We’re always on the go. Even in our free time, we don’t rest. That’s a big self-help problem. People treat rest as failure. We also feel guilty for resting. But rest and recovery is important. Of course, there is also a massive difference between intentional rest that restores your energy vs numbing your energy out and feeling frustrated with ourselves, which a lot of the times is when we give too much of ourselves into distraction.

Your goals start feeling like they belong to a future version of yourself who will have more time, clarity, and motivation. But in this video, we are going to talk about how your current evenings are the only thing that matter. I’m going to help you utilise them so you can be productive, energised, and more fulfilled.

You don’t need more hours in a day, you need to reset the way you use up the crucial time you do have. Everything you can ever dream of: Health, wealth, happiness, and love is accessible to you if you do the 5-9 right. So, here’s 7 strategies I’ve used to stop wasting my evenings and completely transform that time into something that is both productive and fulfilling.

Change Your First Action Move After Work To Avoid Energy Dead Spots

Behavioural Scientist Wendy Wood who studies habits and automatic behaviour said: “Much of human behaviour is driven less by conscious decision making and more by environmental cues and repeated behaviours”. That means your brain recognises the pattern before your conscious mind fully catches up. That’s an important piece of information as you don’t want to be fighting the wrong battle.

If going straight home from the office destroys momentum (which it does for for me), then you can’t rely on discipline when you’re already at home. Change the first action move instead. Go directly to the gym after work. Stop at a coffee shop to work on your passion project. I don’t know, go for a walk around your neighbourhood before stepping a foot into your home.

The purpose is to interrupt the auto pilot loop before decision fatigue fully takes over. Scientists call it implementation intention theory: create specific “if” “then” plans ahead of time. Research shows that people are far more likely to follow through on behaviours when they create a specific situational plan ahead of time. Don’t try making big decisions at once. Most lives are shaped less by huge dramatic choices and more by repeated small decisions that slowly become your identity.

I work two days a week in the office at the moment. So, what I do is go football straight after work. Me and my brothers book a slot for football every Monday for 8 pm. And then on the Thursday, which is my second day in the office, I’ll meet up with my girl for a meal. Most of the evening would include no phone time as I’d just talk with her.

The ”if” and “then” theory also aligns with the “Or-not-and” strategy. If you want to say yes to the things that really matter to you, then you have to say no to something else. Sounds like common sense, but people literally say yes to everything, then try making everything work, which never works out. There is no such thing as not having enough time. There is a such thing as something not being a priority.

Expectations of the ideal is the problem. You shouldn’t try making every evening perfect either, that’s not what I’m trying to say. If you place expectations, every evening will feel like a waste of time, and you will feel bad about it. You will see everything that you wanted to do but couldn’t do and diminish the achievement of what you did do.

This strategy doesn’t mean “I’m going to do this and this and this”. It means “I’m going to do this OR this”. So, actively think about which parts of the day or after what activities do you feel less energetic and bypass them or do something to spike energy at the same time. This is a strategy I continue to do every single day. It makes the biggest difference.

For me, a lot of the time it is the commute home from work. I honestly don’t know how people do 5 days in the office. But spot out energy dead spots and do whatever you can to avoid them or turn them into an energising activity. Could you stay at work an extra hour to do some of your other work? Could you fit in a workout? It might be inconvenient. But is it as inconvenient as feeling tired every single evening for the rest of your life?

Batch Small Tasks, Cut The Tiredness Cycle, & Calibrate Your Natural Energy Levels

Chores and mundane daily tasks don’t seem overwhelming on their own, but together they eat hours of your evening before you ever get to the thing you actually care about. So, do everything in one block instead of scattering it all throughout the week. Pick a time for everything and stick to it. You don’t have to be perfect with this. I write and record in the mornings. I can rarely ever do it after 12pm. I work out when everything settles down around 4pm. I read or meditate at nighttime to wind down.

I hate the idea of “there’s no free time”. In 2024, I quit my job and moved to Malaysia. I thought I had no free time with my day job which was absolute BS. I actually worked less when I quit my job and moved away. Making something your entire focus gives you disappointing results. Stop spending all of your time working expecting the more work you do the better the results you get. You’re basically robbing yourself of the metal freedom to think about things at a big picture level without the pressure to complete tasks and do stuff.

Constantly feeling tired is not normal. Neither is constantly wanting to take naps. Aim to get maximum sleep and recovery because trying to be productive and skip sleep wastes more of your time. I recently went on a holiday to Rome (Italy) for 5 days and came back even more tired. You can’t pour out of any empty cup. If you want to be more productive in the evenings, do you even have the energy to be productive in the evenings? Try experimenting. Look at your current daily schedule. If you think you don’t have a schedule, you do. Look at how much sleep you’re getting and increase it gradually. You may need to change a few things but it’s totally worth it. For me, I usually need 9 hours in bed, even if all of it doesn’t include actual sleep.

Stop Waiting For Motivation Before Taking Action

The belief that you need to feel good before every action is a damaging belief. The belief that you are inspired before creating, energised before exercising, calm before mediating, and confident before starting a new task is an illusion. Consistency comes before motivation, not after it.

If you feel tired, then just do things tired. Go to a dinner with your friends or partner even if you’re in a bad mood. Do a workout even if you’re yawning. Write and record even if you’re creatively slumped. Prove to yourself that you can rely on yourself to do the things that you said you would even if you’re not in a perfect mood. If I’m being brutally honest, you’re not always going to be in a good mood. You’re not going to want to do anything other than to sit on the couch and scroll.

I want you to focus on what it would feel like if you didn’t do it in a week, month, or a year from now. The things that are good for you feel bad at the beginning and amazing afterwards. The things that are bad for you feel great in the beginning and not so good afterwards. Small actions matter so much. They seem insignificant in isolation but overtime it is evidence of who you are. Your future is shaped by what you repeatedly do when no one is watching.

Treat Your Energy Like A Generator, Not A Battery

Just think about how a battery works. It starts 100% charged and as the day goes on it reduces. The more you’re on it, the more it gets drained. This is how people see themselves. The more you do, the more you think, the more you get drained. Make the switch. You’re not a device. Your energy is more like a generator. Certain activities generate energy much faster than just resting and doing nothing.

It doesn’t have to be work based. You can practise an instrument, play a sport, create content on social media. Just have a hobby. Believe it or not, doing this is the solution to your energy problem. Here are a few rules for it.

1. Physical activity – I have a workout around 4pm

2. Cognitively effortful – E.g. solving a puzzle (I normally work on my own projects, like products I’m building for social media etc)

Dedicate some time exploring which activity brings you fulfilment and energy. Spending 30 minutes in the evening learning something new and interesting can really stack up meaningful skills. If you’re interested in business and mindset, content and marketing, spiritualty and consciousness and would like to gain information much faster from me, I would recommend my weekly newsletter. They are emails of the most important stuff I wish I knew when I was first starting out not only on social media, but life itself. It includes interesting perspectives with actionable takeaways.

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